Life as an Arab kid being taught how to swim
I always ask people “Do you remember how you learned to swim?”, and I love it, absolutely love it when most of the Arabs I ask have this common answer of “Yes, my parents just threw me in the pool one day”.
Now, don’t get me wrong, that method is very unsafe, I know this first hand because I didn’t actually learn how to swim that one time but ended up chipping my front tooth at the bottom of the pool somehow. However, this common shared experience we all have as Arab kids, is one my favourite things we have shared between us. Because the way I see it, it’s a metaphor, one that has impacted my life in so many ways.
You see, the “Being thrown into the pool to learn swimming” is my personal “Life is like a box of chocolate” (do take a second to try to remember Tom Hanks saying this sentence because it’s a lovely movie moment).
For the past few years, I’ve been trying to apply this metaphor to my life in different aspects. I applied this to my career, I threw myself into a role that would make me feel uncomfortable and submerged almost every day. Till this day, I’m still learning how to swim dog paddle style and learning how to stay afloat in this career. I applied this to my personal life and I’ve found myself in new meaningful friendships and relationships that make me feel all kind of warm but also challenge me to be a better person every day.
Look, the gist of what I’m trying to say here, is that the fear and anxiousness of being thrown into a pool, is very similar to the discomfort we feel when we’re making life decisions we care about as adults. We are constantly being told to step out of our comfort zone, but maybe sometimes, the key is to just jump out of it and figure it out in the “pool” (aka the situation)?
I understand completely, that this is so much easier said than done. I also understand the importance of taking calculated baby steps, ones that don’t cause you harm and anxiety. Most importantly, I understand the importance of going at your own pace, and not comparing your jumps to others. So, where’s the line? When is it “throw yourself into the pool?” and when is it baby steps that are comfortable enough?
I don’t have an answer, I’m still figuring that out myself to be honest. But, here’s where my head is at this moment when it comes to this specific thought (and I’m not fairly confident with this yet but I like it):
When it comes to the context of making life decisions for yourself, fear/anxiousness is an indicator that you care about something. If you’re scared of taking that big jump in your career, asking your crush out, or simply signing up for those gym classes that promise to change your life, I think it means you care.
Maybe, the amount of fear/anxiousness you feel about the decision has a relative relationship with how much you care about taking that step?
Maybe, the fear/anxiousness is the only language your gut knows how to speak? (This is such a romanticised idea but you get the point)
All in all, the reason this piece typed itself on this computer, is a couple of “aha” moments I’ve had lately:
1- I remember feeling like I’m missing out on swimming as a kid, and sometimes I think that if I don’t take these jumps, then when I’m old and grey, I’ll feel like the kid on the side of a pool again.
2- Everything I have in my life that is worth something, scared the crap out of me in the beginning, but here I am, swimming, and the water is really nice you guys.
Hope you take your jumps, or your calculated baby steps, or a sweet combination of them both. And in the words of the ever-wise Dory, remember, just keep swimming.
